Since my Last Post...

I can’t believe I haven’t written in almost a month! I’m sure by now I’ve lost a few readers but hope to get them back.

Since my last post this has been my life:

1.       I started my English Theory and Criticism class. I’m taking this class so that I can get back to my analytical writing and in the future apply and get accepted into the MFA program. I won’t be applying for that program any time soon though. The program I have applied to is the MPA program (masters in public administration). I’m waiting to hear back if I will be accepted. Needless to say, I’m nervous since I have never taken a public administration course. I applied for the winter quarter which means I may be a graduate student come January 2012!

2.       One of my long time best friends is back in my life and I couldn’t be happier! One day to the next I simply made up my mind to send her a message. Short and sweet. I let her know there was no need to reply since we had a fall out. To my surprise, there she was replying to me and having a conversation with me before work. That night, September 16^th we met up for dinner. I wore a rose in my hair so that she could recognize me though it wasn’t truly needed. We poured our hearts out and caught up on each other’s lives. There’s a change between us and I’m thankful for that change because no matter what, we need each other in our lives. There is a connection between us that will never be broken.

3.       While life was going so well horror entered my life. The last week of September, my house was broken into. A lot was lost but no one was hurt. My dad called me at while I was at work to hurry home and there is when I learned all that was gone, forever. I will not get into details since I don’t want to break down once more. Currently, we’re still dealing with this dreadfulness and hope that we will be able to get past it all by the end of this month. The insurance claim is such a long and tedious process. This event changed me, I feel as though I can’t trust anyone but I shouldn’t keep living like this. I need to push through and find myself once more. While there is evil in this world, there is also good. There is family that will hold me and care for me though I’m fully grown. Make dinner and let me know this too will pass with time. All I need is time. There are friends who keep me in their thoughts. Send me a thoughtful card that brings tears to my eyes because I was thought of. Get in contact with me though they have busy lives, make time for me. I have a loving husband that vows to make things right though we both know how impossible that is. Through this all I can still smile and laugh and get past it all because in all reality, there is nothing left for me to do but push through. I will be me again.

4.       I’ve deleted my Facebook. I truly needed to get away from all that social networking. I didn’t see the use of it in my life and it was starting to be such an addiction while I tried to find a purpose for it in my life. So now, it’s gone. Yes, I may go back to it in the future but this won’t be until months from now. I need something more creative in life and so I’ll spend more time focusing on my blog. A friend of mine said that tumblr might be my cup of tea and so I’ll be trying that out. I’ll make sure to post my link once I have it up and running.

This is my life at the moment, it’s been hard but I’m still finding reasons to smile.

Missing the Pavement

I didn't get to run today. I had some time but just didn't really get to it.

Now I feel stressed. Now I have thoughts running through my head. Now I feel that I wont be able to get to sleep fast enough. Now I feel anxious and troubled.

I know I'm not the best runner and I never expected to be. I know I'm not that experienced but I'm working at it and I am trying. One thing I do know is that I love it! I love the feeling after the run. The way I can feel my blood pumping throughout my body. The sweat running down my back, down my chest. The feeling I get knowing I just accomplished a mini goal for that day and am closer to my bigger goal at the end of the year. Its an amazing feeling and a great high! I love it!

Tonight though I lay in bed "writing" on my phone and I don't have any of that. I only have the feeling of stress from the day. I only have my trouble-some thoughts keeping me awake.

This is not a good way to end the day.

At least I now know, that if I think about skipping a run due to time it is NOT going to make me feel better. I am going to feel like THIS.

But being the person I am... I will push on and try to end today on a good note. I will try meditation. I will think of beautiful thoughts. I will think of only that which makes me happy and I will light my favorite candle and then once I am in a good place I will simply stop thinking and listen only to my breathing and Mr. Husband's breathing.

Tonight before I sleep... I will find peace and let go of my stress.

posted from Bloggeroid

The Vacation Has Ended

My vacation has come and gone. It was well needed and I loved it! For the most part Mr. Husband and I just spend time together and relaxed. It was wonderful and I feel amazing! I feel so refreshed and vibrant!

One of the events that I must share with you all was the dinner at The Crow Bar. Last year Mr. Husband and I tried this restaurant out and it was amazing! I loved it! I just simply fell in love with it and I couldn't wait to go back. This time off from work we made it a point to head out there for dinner, it didn't matter if we didn't have anything else planned! I just wanted to have dinner there! Period!

the crow bar

Mr. Husband studying the menu

The appetizer, grilled zucchini with goat cheese    

My dinner, amazing! It has cream cheese in it!! 

Mr. Husband's dinner... all meat oh and fries 

Mr. Husband's desert, homemade ding dong!! YUM! 

My desert, simple but oh so very yummy!! 

Dinner was amazing and I'm going to have to go again before the end of the year. Everything was amazing and the service is awesome! When you get a chance you have to stop by and try it out!! I hope you do and I hope you enjoy it! 

Vacation Post 1

I am now well into my vacation and this is what I have accomplished thus far:

Thursday, September 1st
On my first day off I took my new car to have the navigation installed. When we went in to buy the dealership didn't have one in stock with navigation and so we had to go back to have it installed. Why get navigation? Well, why not? From time to time I use my phone for navigation or still print out directions. Finally, there will be no need for that! More importantly though, FINALLY I will never again get lost! (fingers crossed)

I had mentioned, either here or on Facebook that Mr. Husband had something BIG planned for September 1st. The kick off to our vacation was that he planned for us to get the tattoo I had wanted in the past on our wrests. Which was something similar to this one:

He was going to get "I want her" and he wanted me to get on my tinny wrist "He wants me." Now the reason for this verbiage is because when he asked me to be his girlfriend he didn't really ask me but rather stated it. If you read my past blog entitled "I want you." then you already know the story, if you haven't read it then please do. If you didn't catch on already... I didn't get the tattoo. I just didn't feel ready to get it and something in me was terrified to get a visible tattoo! Mr. Husband didn't get his either and I told him I just needed more time, I had doubt and when I was ready I would let him know. So until then, that tattoo is on hold.

Friday, September 2nd
On our eighth anniversary we celebrated by... cleaning the house and organizing the spare room. We kept putting this off and we decided enough was enough. We couldn't hide the mess behind closed doors any longer and so we cleaned and organized! There were about four boxes we had to go through and a bunch of military stuff that had to be put away. This little project took about six hours but it got done. Mr. Husband and I have been together for eight years and didn't feel the need to make a big deal about it because we celebrate our love every day. We don't wait for our anniversary, we don't wait for valentines day! We celebrate it every day, every night and even when we're away because we're happy to have each other and thankful to have one another. Yes, I'm a hopeless romantic and think that our love is the greatest but everyone that loves and is loved feels the same! Admit it!

Saturday, September 3rd
We did nothing but relax and enjoy the day. We were tired from the day before and so we stayed home. One productive task I did do was go for a run in the afternoon with my little big brother, I love going on runs with him. We push each other.

Sunday, September 4th
The highlight of the day, we went shooting! We hadn't gone in months and we had an itch! The shooting range was packed and there was a girl crying in the corner and it wasn't me! Being the nice person I am I walked over and asked her if she was okay while Mr. Husband set up our lane. It was her first time and it was too much for her, I gave her some pointers and let her know that it gets easier the second time and wished her good luck. This being my fifth time I was ready to shoot Mr. Husband's . 45 and that I did! Mr. Husband says I look like a natural when I shoot and very much relaxed. Some men went up to him asking what I was shooting and he was proud to show off his wife (me) shooting his gun with ease and with awesome aim! After the 100 rounds, we visited my in law's and had dinner with them. When we got home I went on a run solo.

Monday, September 5th
The morning started off with me throwing everything out of my closet! I had no idea what to where for our adventure but deiced to just wear one of my favorite dresses. Simple. Easy.

Our (Mr. Husband, Little Big Brother and myself) first distention was The Museum of Death. My co-worker had told me about it and finally got around to going.

This is a museum I know I'll be going back to over and over again. There is just so much to see and while a lot of it is disturbing and not for everyone it is VERY interesting! You have to go in with an open mind and a strong stomach. If you laugh at horror movies and can handle seeing dead bodies/body parts and want to learn about death then the Museum of Death is a place you must visit! If you don't want to learn about it then just go, it's too interesting to pass up. The staff is very friendly and they have a dog named Buddy walking around the museum.

Our next stop was the Los Angeles County Museum of Art. Now I must admit this was my first time going to the LACMA. I know, I know! It's disgraceful! Now what was the main reason I went? The Tim Burton Exhibition!!! The moment I heard there was going to be an exhibition of his I just had to go and see it! It was amazing and I loved every moment of it! I enjoyed it so much that I plan to go back just in case I missed something and if I didn't miss anything I'm sure to enjoy it as much as I did the first time.  We lucked out, we had to wait about two hours to be able to go in the exhibit and today admission to all the exhibits were free! Well not all, the only one you had to pay for was the Tim Burton exhibit but I sure didn't mind! So we got to walk around and see as much as possible and enjoy out time.


As you can tell, there aren't many pictures that I took for this post and there are reasons for that.

1. I forgot to charge my camera
2. They don't allow pictures at museums
3. I was not in the mood to take pictures and Mr. Husband and Little Big Brother are not the best photographers


Tomorrow Mr. Husband and I will be off for another adventure and I promise to take more pictures this time around. Pictures always make the blogs better.

Thanks for reading! I hope you make plans to visit either The Museum of Death or the Tim Burton exhibit, I say you visit both though!  

Almost Bidding Farewell...

I logged on tonight for one purpose. To bid farewell to my blog... once more this was going to be a blog that I would be giving up on. Mainly because I felt that I lost my way in what this blog was meant to be. The purpose of this blog was to get me to start writing and I was writing but then stopped. Could you blame me dear reader? My heart still feels so heavy BUT the purpose for me to write is so that I can show the world that while life pushes me down I will not stay down. I will go on smiling and laughing and loving my simple difficult life. I will live on because I have no idea what tomorrow may bring. As I was writing my good bye post, my good bye for now because I felt that maybe I would come back, I changed my mind. I can't let go, what I must do though is write on. Write about whatever it is that I feel like writing but just write! Its one of the few things that keeps me sane. Even if I have but only one reader, I will write because I love the feeling I get when I type my thoughts away... 

Vacation Coming Soon

Tomorrow will finally be my vacation from work! Mr. Husband will be taking time off of work as well so that we can spend time together. We don’t have anything planned but at the same time we do. We plan on doing a lot of which we always want to do but can’t find the time. I'll be posting what we do so that if you, my readers find it interesting can also make time to go to the places, eat at the resturants, and so on.

Tomorrow, first thing in the morning I will be taking my new car (2011 Nissan Mureno LE) to get my navigation installed. Now I'll NEVER get lost!

This is what my new car (SUV) looks like, I have yet to take a good picture of MINE.



Mr. Husband will be working his last day (tomorrow) but he has something special planned out for us that night he says. I can’t wait to see what the kick off to our vacation will be!

Stay tuned!  

"I want you."

Years ago (2006) when 'Stranger Than Fiction' came out I saw it as a joke. It was yet again another dumb comedy with Will Farrell. I was told by many that I should give it a chance, but I wouldn’t cave in. My family watched it and expressed to me just what a great movie it was but still I would not budge.

It wasn’t until late one night in 2007, one of my many sleepless nights in which I was once more thinking of Mr. Husband and missing him. He was currently in Iraq and I had just finished one of our short, quick but beautiful conversations. I couldn’t sleep, as I waited for that moment in which I could finally rest my eyes and as I finished Mr. Husband’s letter for that day 'Stranger than Fiction' began in the background. With nothing else to watch and with my letter complete, I figured the movie would put me to sleep and so I watched.

I was mistaken. I couldn’t be more wrong about this beautiful, breath-taking movie! I cried, no I sobbed at the end. Since then this has been one of my favorite movies and today I got to watch this marvelous movie once more and reminisce.   

Sitting alone I was able to think back as to what caught my attention. It’s obvious why so many people believed that I would love the movie. It was about a writer, it was about a writer writing a book, it was about a writer having writers block and it was about a man who was hearing this writer, write about his life knowing that he was going to die at the end. If that doesn’t scream me I don’t know what does. What people didn’t know that would catch my attention was one single moment, a single line in the movie...

Harold Crick realizes that he has feelings for Anna Pascal and when he finally admits it to himself and allows himself to act on it, he rushes over to her bakery with flours. 

Yes, I meant to write the word flour, as in baking flour. I thought that was one of the sweetest moments ever, romantic and dorky! 

Then the Harold said words that I will never forget because they’re words that were once uttered to me.

“I want you.”

This is how Harold let Anna Pascal know that he had feelings for her and this is how Mr. Husband let me know on September 2, 2003 parked in his black 3000GT at Jurupa park drinking coffee that he had feelings for me and that he wanted me to be his. "I want you."

Now, imagine me then, sitting in the dead of night watching this movie and hearing those words. There was no way that I wasn’t going to fall in love with this movie. For once I actually believed that Will Ferrell was capable of acting and not coming out with some joke of a movie.

If you haven’t watched this movie yet, I hope you now will. It truly is a great movie, Will Ferrell did an amazing job.